Thunderous Thoughts: All World Huggers Team

Welcome to Thunderous Thoughts, where topics range from Andre Roberson’s hugs to Andre Roberson’s shot. This week, open up your arms.

Last week, Andre Roberson made headlines when he went around hugging members of the Oklahoma City Thunder organizations. Given the day (NBA trade deadline day), people went crazy, thinking that Roberson was saying his final goodbyes.

Turns out, Andre Roberson just likes to hug.

Nothing wrong with that. I like to hug too. People think I’m a little weird because I’d rather hug people I’m comfortable with than give them a handshake when greeting them or saying goodbye. There are plenty of famous people who like to hug. They also like basketball. Hugging and basketball go together more than people think.

I’ve put together an elite team of basketball playing huggers that would take the league by storm with superior shooting, precise passing, dynamite defense, and humongous hugs.

Point Guard: J.D. from Scrubs

Don’t let the above clip fool you. J.D. might not be much of a shooter, but neither is Semaj Christon, and he’s in the NBA. What J.D. brings to the table is a peskiness on defense that few can match. He’s also a top-notch passer, who thinks and sees the game differently than everyone else.

J.D. knows how to run an offense. He’ll put guys in the right position to succeed. He’s a doctor. So, you know he’s smart. He’ll always find the open person. While some believe he’s selfish, I believe he just has a passion for winning.

MUST READ: Keep overreacting until they lose

As for his hug game, J.D. has a diverse attack. He’s very open with his feelings, never shies away from bringing it in for the real thing, and even breaks out the sneak hug when necessary.

Shooting Guard: Bayley

https://twitter.com/itsBayleyWWE/status/814617541947625472

WWE Women’s Champion Bayley is an exceptional athlete. She played high school basketball, and was named captain in her senior year. She’s the friggin women’s wrestling champion of the world. They don’t just give that title to anyone. You have to earn it.

Bayley is a true underdog, which makes her perfect at the shooting guard position. Did you know that Michael Jordan was cut from his high school basketball team and sucked at baseball? He’s one of the biggest underdog stories of all-time. And he turned out to be pretty good at the whole basketball thing. Perhaps you’ve heard of him?

Bayley makes it well-known that she’s going to hug it out with you. Her t-shirt says, “I’m A Hugger.” There are no surprises with her. Even her finishing move is a hug. And then she picks you up and slams you on your back. But it’s the thought that counts.

Small Forward: Andre Roberson

A no-brainer, here. Thunder fans know all about Roberson. He’s one of the best perimeter defenders in the league, a great screener, and suddenly an amazing shooter. Some even believe that he’s the (low-key) MVP of the Thunder.

Roberson rounds out a stout backcourt defense. All three have the ability to switch everything up top, and harass offensive players all over the court. With J.D’s playmaking ability, Bayley’s shooting, and Roberson’s all-around offensive brilliance, you’ll be hard pressed to find a more complete threesome in the league.

While Andre Roberson is arguably the best basketball player on this basketball team, he might be the worst hugger.

Power Forward: Ralph Wiggum

Ralph may not look like much, but every team needs a stocky power forward that other teams are afraid of. You really think people want to go near this kid after he’s been picking his nose for five minutes? He may not be the smartest guy on the team, but at least JaVale McGee’s mom and the Warriors won’t have to complain to TNT about Shaq making fun of JaVale too much once Ralph enters the league.

MUST READ: Norris Cole signs with OKC

Ralph is a back to the basket beast in the paint. Throw him the ball, and watch him go to work. And he loves basketball, which is something you can’t teach. Just check out the above clip. He brought his basketball to football practice. If Anthony Bennett had that kind of commitment, maybe he’d still be in the league.

As the founding member of the Hug Club, you already know Ralph’s hug game is on point. He’s a guy who wants “all the love” and will squeeze it out of you if he has to.

Center: Danny Tanner

Every good team needs a strong center, and the All World Huggers immediately have one of the best centers in the game. Danny Tanner is tall, sneaky athletic, smart, and well-rounded. Trust me when I tell you that no one keeps the paint as clean as Tanner.

Look at the clip above. He not only shows off nice touch around the rim, but look at the way he seals off his man as Joey Gladstone drives to the hoop. That’s veteran level stuff. And check out some of those passes. He’s passing through four guys on one play. I dare you to find a center as skilled as Tanner.

His long arms make for exceptional hugs. Tanner is often ridiculed for the amount of times he likes to hug, but he always gets his arms around you. You can’t help but love the big guy.

Sixth Person: Carlton Banks

Never got the attention that his cousin Will got, but don’t let Carlton fool you, he can ball. The above clip doesn’t do his game justice. Carlton is a guy who just needs the ball in his hands more often. If he’s frozen out on offense, he becomes angry. But let him shoot, and he’ll shoot the lights out.

Carlton is scrappy. Undersized and always picked on, Carlton knows how to get mean on the court. This is a man who was willing to go to MacArthur Park like it was some trip to Disney Land. Don’t tell me he’s going to get bullied.

Carlton may not be the most braggadocios hugger, but he makes every hug count. He also brings a unique energy to his hugs, setting them up with a big smile, and sometimes a dance.

Coach: Ari Gold

Ari is a genius. He took a kid from New York, who was stuck doing Mentos commercials, and turned him into Auqaman. This guy knows how to coach talent and manage the egos of everyone.

A little hot-headed, Ari isn’t afraid to stick up for and defend his players. He’s a guy you definitely want on your side. He’s willing to use underhand tactics if needed, which is another sign of a great coach. If you ain’t cheating, you ain’t trying.

MUST READ: OKC Blue Report

Ari isn’t the strongest hugger, but that’s okay, because he’s the coach. He knows when to suggest the hug.

Other Thunder Thoughts

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• Aleksej Pokusevski sidelined approximately 6 weeks with ankle injury
• Damian Lillard does not fit with the OKC Thunder

*Norris Cole is such a good signing because it means Semaj Christon is out of the rotation. Cole’s defense and experience should be valuable in the playoffs.

*The more comfortable Doug McDermott gets in the offense, the more games he’ll have like he did against the Jazz.

*When Victor Oladipo returns, I really hope Alex Abrines doesn’t see his minutes significantly reduced.

*Jerami Grant is turning into a really nice player. Maybe that trade doesn’t look so bad after all.