Welcome to Thunderous Thoughts. A weekly look at the OKC Thunder where, for the love of God can the season start already?
Taylor Swift released her video for Look What You Made Me Do on Sunday. Being the resident OKC Thunder/Taylor Swift fanatic, it would be incredibly #onbrand for me to equate that video with various members of the Thunder.
So, that’s what I’m going to do. Give me a break – it’s the offseason and we can only talk about Russell Westbrook’s extension or the acquisition of Paul George so many times.
Zombie Taylor – Sam Presti
Just when you thought Sam Presti was dead and couldn’t do anything with no assets, he flips Victor Oladipo and Domantas Sabonis for Paul George and then signs Raymond Felton and Patrick Patterson. Sam Presti is never dead. He’s the friggin’ Night King.
Diamond Tub Taylor – Doug McDermott
McDermott is going to be a stud this year. He’ll have the spacing he didn’t have last year on either unit and he’ll reportedly see some time at the four. I don’t think he was properly used last season, but attribute that to limited roster flexibility and coming over to the team at the deadline. With a better roster and a full training camp, I expect big things out of McBuckets.
Snake Queen Taylor – Thunder Fans
Pretty self-explanatory, right?
Car Crash Taylor – Semaj Christon
Every time Semaj was given the keys to the offense last year, it was the most epic car crash ever witnessed on a basketball court.
Circus Cage Swing Taylor – Enes Kanter
Enes Kanter is kind of a circus act all to himself on and off the court. But he’s our circus act.
Cat Mask Criminal Taylor – Paul George
Who is Paul George? We thought we knew what we were getting, but now he’s hanging out with Draymond Green – that never ends well. Will he gel with the team? Does he already have one foot in free agency? I’m very worried that Paul George isn’t an innocent cat and is about to rob us of a great season and possibly more.
Biker Taylor – Steve Adams
Steven Adams drives a motorcycle and has definitely worn a studded hat in his life.
Dominatrix Leader Taylor – Nick Collison
Hear me out on this one. Who do we want leading our squad more than anyone? Your first answer is probably Russell Westbrook, but it’s a little worrisome that Westbrook has yet to sign the triple double extension. The real answer is Nick Collison, Collison is the most loyal player in Thunder history and he’s never once complained or wavered. If every player who walked through the doors of the Thunder facility acted like Nick Collison, we fans would have nothing to worry about.
Flashdance Taylor – Cameron Payne
He’s not technically on the roster anymore, but he may as well be. Payne did more for OKC than he’ll likely ever do in Chicago; his potential alone helped net the Thunder some extremely valuable assets. You’ll always be Russell Westbrook’s dance partner to us, Cam.
New Taylor – Russell Westbrook
Last year’s Russell Westbrook needs to die. As amazing as he was and as much fun as we had, he can’t be that Westbrook if this team is going to succeed this year. He needs to be a new version of himself. Combine the 2015-16 version with the 2016-17 version and give me the Look What You Made Me Do version of Russell Westbrook.